indifference

Because of indifference, one dies before one actually dies.
Elie Wiesel

I experienced a big bout of indifference today at a place I least expected it. But now I think about it, it probably was always there. I just didn´t notice, didn´t want to see it, didn´t want to believe it. Now, after having been away for a while, I really felt it. It almost blew me over. There was a time I had put all of my hopes and dreams on that place and the people in it. It was the wrong thing to do but I had no way of knowing and no choice either. I feel relieved now that I know but also sad that it is this way. It´s like saying good bye to someone you thought of as a friend but who never really wanted to know you.